The Story Of A Suicide!

“In everybody’s life there’s a point of no return. And in a very few cases, a point where you can’t go forward anymore. And when we reach that point, all we can do is quietly accept the fact. That’s how we survive.”

                         ~Haruki Murakami,

 

Life is a constant struggle. No one down the ages has ever said that it would be easy. One has to pass through several trials and tribulations in the journey of life on a regular basis and overcome the hurdles to survive in this world.Humans seem to be hardwired to adapt to their circumstances and find ways to challenge any threat they face and come out victorious most often.

 

Each human has this inherent desire for living n surviving even in the hardest of circumstances and conditions.Generally, this human spirit of strength prevails and the person remains afloat in the whirlpool of life in spite of hundreds of setbacks and failures, in hope for better times ahead.

 

But sometimes, there  comes a point when all hope shatters, and one feels completely helpless and defeated in the race of life. There seems to be no solution to the problems they are facing, there is no way in sight to escape from where they are stuck.They start considering themselves as total failures. At this point, they think that only way to end their suffering  and pain is to end their lives. The thought of suicide grips them and entangles them completely.

 

To kill is not easy! and to kill one’s own self, even more so!

 

So why are they strong enough to kill themselves but not strong enough to live?

 

Is it that they have not failed, BUT, the society, the world  has failed them?

 

Such drastic steps come to mind when there is no hope left, person becomes totally hopeless. Humans need hope to live their lives and face the difficulties and hardships, in anticipation of a brighter and better tomorrow. Hope takes away the pain of today and washes away the frustration of the past regrets. Without hope, it becomes difficult to face the stark realities of life.

 

Recently i read the novel ‘THE STORY OF A SUICIDE ‘on this important issue by Sriram Ayer. In this, the stories of Hari, Charu, Sam and Mani have been narrated in a gripping style. The lives of these four youngsters are connected through a web of love, passion, revenge and deceit. The story line is powerful and the struggles of the young people have been very well verbalized through the story. The book can be read here http://www.storyofasuicide.com

It is a very good attempt to reach out to youngsters and make them understand their emotions and reactions better. After each chapter of the book, there is a information and guidance section with  how to overcome, do’s and don’t on various relevant topics like depression, heartbreak, loss, failure, harassment, sexual abuse, loneliness, complicated relationships, hurt,sadness and the proper course of action in such circumstances is suggested in a very comprehensive format. This feature is really commendable and makes the novel a self help guide. http://www.storyofasuicide.com/how-do-i-all.html
The book successfully highlights the important topics of societal prejudices and stereotyping, judgmental attitude about sexual orientation of an individual, sexual abuse stigma, harassment and lack of support system for those who are in distress.
Different chapters of the book bring forth  the struggles and hurdles the characters come across in their lives and how the society adds to making live hell for them. How Hari is judged for being a gay, Charu for being an independent minded strong girl,Mani for his poverty and lack of English know how and how Sam reacts irrationally to un-reciprocated love and  Is not society meant to have a cushioning and supporting effect for its individuals in times of need? The societal expectations and conformist attitude plays a havoc in their lives and almost  drives them insane. Once their emotions start the downward spiral towards regret,sadness, guilt or fear, their mental frame work seems to be out of control.
The human behavior and its shortcomings are nicely depicted. The book is truly a mirror to present day society and its parameters of judgement. We regularly come across similar cases in mainstream media. But raising such issues is just not enough, long term feasible solutions need to be discussed and found for such issues. This book is a strong step in such  a direction.
Some lines worth highlighting which had a deep impact on me are mentioned below

Perfection is a road, not a destination!

 

Perfection is but an illusion ! Strive for improvement, not for perfection. If you feel perfection is a static state , then it is non-achievable. But improvement is a state of motion, a constant work towards progress.

 

” Perfection doesn’t exist in anyone. Striving for perfection in any part of our lives is a recipe for failure, since it can never be attained.”              ~Dr John Grohol

 

If one sets perfection to be the ultimate goal, yet is not able to achieve it in due time, it can lead to frustration and also to aversion towards taking risks which can further develop into fear.

 

” If you look for perfection, you’ll never be content.”             ~Leo Tolstoy

 

The constant pursuit of perfection can nevertheless lead us to excellence.

So keep chasing Perfection, in order to excel!

 

 

 

Believe In Yourself During Times Of Struggle !

The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern.Beautiful people do not just happen.

~Elizabeth kubler

There are days when things are not the way you had hoped they would be. At other times you may feel disappointed.

During such times, continue to trust your judgment and values. Keep following your chosen path. Accept the challenges and look for their solutions. Don’t just focus on the problems.

It is definitely not easy, but in such times of Struggle, you can be your strongest support system.

Work out the changes that need to be made. It may mean changing your mindset or your goals, changing your course of action to overcome the hurdles and blocks.

Find a solution, implement it and do away with the problem.

Remember to believe in yourself !

Laughter uncontrolled !

To recall a time when i laughed uncontrollably…i am taken back in time to this particular incident when i was in college.  We had organised a new year’s party in our engineering college campus. There was lot of fun and revelry which continued well past the midnight.

Just before the party was about to end, there was a slight disagreement between two of my friends Rahul and Mahesh regarding the music that the DJ was playing; soon this escalated to  a full  verbal duel . Rest of us some how managed to calm them down till the party ended.

But on reaching the hostel, Rahul was still simmering with anger. He was my roomie so i had to tolerate his constant rant against Mahesh’s behavior. I tried to convince him to go to sleep but in vain.

Out of irritation and anger he decided to send Mahesh an SMS filled with choicest four letter words. He rested only after he had sent that message. He looked quite content and proceeded to show me the message content he had forwarded.

On taking a closer look at the name of the recipient i was shocked to my core…the recipient was not our class mate Mahesh but our mechanics professor Mahesh .S.

Probably blinded by hurry,tiredness and anger Rahul had forwarded the message to the wrong person…..in fact very wrong person!

What happened after that and how Rahul managed to convince the professor about the truth is a long story. But he, over night became the comedy king for us and till this day all the batch mates burst into uncontrolled laughter when ever we remember that event…now even Rahul manages to laugh on it but this was not the case when he had discovered the error that eventful night 🙂

 

Roaring Laughter

Quote I Believe In

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All’s Well That Ends Well !

Quote Me

 

I believe once the trials and tribulations are over ,one should focus on the good end results that have been achieved out of the difficulties.

There is no sense in wasting time,feelings and emotions on what was not so good in the journey if the end results are positive.

HELP A CHILD STUDY AND BUILD A BETTER FUTURE !

There are thousands of children in our country who have a deep desire to study and learn but they are not able to fulfill this because of lack of resources. Children are the future of the society and nation.These children also have a lot of talent and capabilities within them which can shine through if they get a chance to nurture them.

Let us share a little of the abundance which God has bestowed upon us and provide a helping hand.

Sharing is caring and it helps in multiplying love,satisfaction,happiness and abundance.

Education can ensure their well being and provide them security of a better life in future. As responsible citizens of our country it is our duty to do whatever is possible in our capacity to provide help in achieving this humanitarian task.

When children of a nation progress,the future of the country will be bright and the country as a whole will progress and prosper.

Thanking you in advance !

Activity: Help A Child to Study sponsors the higher education of meritorious underprivileged students, supporting them to achieve dreams of a better future. We sponsor all formal courses above 10th, including 11th and 12th, diploma courses, degree courses, B.E., M.B.B.S. and Postgrad. Through education our students are able to escape the cycle of poverty through their own talents.

Details: We are very proud of our students – who are the children of labourers, small scale farmers, weavers and other families with low incomes. These students have enormous potential to succeed and only need financial support to do so. We are thrilled that today some of our graduates are placed with large companies such as Mahindra Tech, L&T, and TATA Consultancy Services.

Support: Education, higher education, sponsorship of students.

Note: We are looking for financial donations to support the higher education of our students, most of whom live in rural areas of Maharashtra and Karnataka.

This post is a part of BlogAdda’s Bloggers Social Responsibility (BSR) initiative. I am exercising my BSR. You can too with three simple steps. Visit http://www.blogadda.com/bsr/ and support the NGO’s.

LAUGH,LOVE,LIVE !

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Posted on January 30, 2016January 30, 2016 by AryanIronMan

 

It’s something of altruism that if one knows to laugh well,only then can he live well.

 

Role of laughter in love relationships is very vital. It cannot be over emphasized. Two people cannot coexist peacefully if they cannot laugh together and enjoy it.This can be taken as a measuring scale of how true and deep the relationship is.

 

If the love is real,a person will definitely try to make the partner happy,relaxed and calm.What better way than a dose of humor to cool down hassled nerves?

 

Lack of humor in any relationship can be a warning sign. It should be taken seriously and amends should be made by consciously adding a wholesome dose of laughter in your interactions with your love partner.

 

When you can laugh on small witty episodes,then this means you can also find joy in the little pleasures of life.You and your partner can cruise over the ups and downs of life successfully with a shared sense of humor.

 

Laughter also has physiological health benefits which is good enough reason to make your partner  laugh more if you genuinely love him/her.

 

Some of the benefits of laughter are:-

1) enhances immunity

2) reduces blood pressure

3) boon for respiratory and cardiovascular system

4) increases natural painkillers in the blood

5) helps in reducing stress and tension

 

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Thus learning to laugh is a very useful tool and life lesson.It enhances the overall well being of a person and also of those around him as it is contagious.It a spreads fast to bring cheer all around.

 

It has often been observed that people who are funny are ‘survivors’ in real life.They have learned to smile inspite of the hardships they faced. They use comedy to hide their emotional trauma and tears.They have decided to choose optimism over pessimism and to move forward in life with full   enthusiasm.

 

According to a research done by Stanford university using MRI scans,men are hardwired to produce humor while women are programmed to appreciate humor. This explains why laughter has such an important well fitted role in the dynamics of love relationships.

 

Laughter makes the bond of love stronger,closer and log lasting.It proves to be a breath of fresh air for relationship.

 

Lot of relationship problems can be solved and handled effectively in the light, friendly atmosphere when humor is used intelligently.

 

Partner who has a great sense of humor is a true blessing as he /she can provide much needed respite from any stressful situation which are so common place in today’s fast paced world.

 

A funny man is a real heart stealer,according to most women who were surveyed for a study.

Marilyn Monroe had also famously said”If you can make a woman laugh you can make her do anything”.

‘Anything’most definitely includes love at the top of the list.

If you can laugh together you can love and live together.

Keep laughing and loving !

 

This post is a part of #LoveAndLaughter activity atBlogAdda in association withCaratlane.”

Image courtesy: pixabay.com(free domain)

video courtesy: Blogadda.com

 

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